Jemele Hill--hooping it up in happier days ESPN talking head Jemele Hill got herself into hot water with her head honchos and the government over the weekend when she Tweeted a few casual observations about the White House’s current occupant, among them being that he was a white supremacist and a bigot.
The White House said that was plainly untrue, which itself is plainly untrue, because the cheddar-colored commander of our national fate is on record as calling for stern measures to be taken against Mexicans and Muslims, merely because they are Mexicans and Muslims. His pals include Steve Bannon, Joe Arpaio and Jeff Sessions, people who also claim not to be white supremacists, but just prefer to act like them. Everybody could be wrong about them. Perhaps they have big parties where they all get together to be racially neutral.
But Jemele doubts that, and Tweeted her doubts to the world. This Administration, which every day shows our citizens that it cannot take criticism or even a joke very well, called for Jemelle to be fired by ESPN. The sports network has not done that yet, although Jemelle has been taken to the woodshed and told it is not the sports network’s job not to get involved in politics.
They are probably right—people who paint their faces in primary colors to show their rabid lust for a particular college or pro franchise probably don’t spend a crap-ton of time thinking about the three branches of government, and you see a lot of those guys on ESPN. So Jemele will probably keep her opinions about Trump’s white supremacist tendencies on the down low from now on.
But this column is here to help her. Here are fifteen things you can call the Big Cheeto without implying in the most remote way that he is a racist:
President Twitter Twaddle
Popular vote loser
Big white chocolate rabbit in the basket of deplorables
Melania’s main squeeze
Small-handed shitbird
Caucasian-in Chief
Golf twat
Dementia Don
Bannon’s butt buddy
Hankering for some Ivankering
President Squeak Toy
Pencil-dick dictator
Nuclear wanker
Chin flab Fuhrer
Taco-bowl eating turdbite.
Have at it, Jemele. You go, girl.
The White House said that was plainly untrue, which itself is plainly untrue, because the cheddar-colored commander of our national fate is on record as calling for stern measures to be taken against Mexicans and Muslims, merely because they are Mexicans and Muslims. His pals include Steve Bannon, Joe Arpaio and Jeff Sessions, people who also claim not to be white supremacists, but just prefer to act like them. Everybody could be wrong about them. Perhaps they have big parties where they all get together to be racially neutral.
But Jemele doubts that, and Tweeted her doubts to the world. This Administration, which every day shows our citizens that it cannot take criticism or even a joke very well, called for Jemelle to be fired by ESPN. The sports network has not done that yet, although Jemelle has been taken to the woodshed and told it is not the sports network’s job not to get involved in politics.
They are probably right—people who paint their faces in primary colors to show their rabid lust for a particular college or pro franchise probably don’t spend a crap-ton of time thinking about the three branches of government, and you see a lot of those guys on ESPN. So Jemele will probably keep her opinions about Trump’s white supremacist tendencies on the down low from now on.
But this column is here to help her. Here are fifteen things you can call the Big Cheeto without implying in the most remote way that he is a racist:
President Twitter Twaddle
Popular vote loser
Big white chocolate rabbit in the basket of deplorables
Melania’s main squeeze
Small-handed shitbird
Caucasian-in Chief
Golf twat
Dementia Don
Bannon’s butt buddy
Hankering for some Ivankering
President Squeak Toy
Pencil-dick dictator
Nuclear wanker
Chin flab Fuhrer
Taco-bowl eating turdbite.
Have at it, Jemele. You go, girl.
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