Guess what? It's fourth period... America’s Ex, speaking at a clucking for loons in DC, namely the Moms for Liberty, claimed that America’s children are being surgically transformed into the opposite sex during recesses at America’s public schools.
Or maybe homeroom periods—the Bellowing Felon was not clear what portion of the school day school officials were devoting to sex reassignment surgery, which typically takes at least two weeks and sometimes months to recover from. Not according to the Mango Miscreant, who said, “Your kid goes to school and comes home a few days later with an operation.”
The collective gasping from the media, the Twittersphere and bloggers everywhere was that of all the things Trump claimed have happened that never really happened, this was the most likely to have never really happened, ever. As Liz Cheney shrewdly observed, "Everybody's marbles fall out of a different hole in the sack," but a Trump campaign spokesperson went off the record to aver the truth of what the Cantaloupe Convict said.
“Absolutely it happens. You send little sophomore Johnny to school and he comes back Joan. A lot of Democrat states, parents almost expect it. While they’ve spent their son’s childhood buying him baseball gloves and guns, they’ve got a backup closet full of capri pants and Taylor Swift CD’s just in case the school bus drops him off in a dress. They know their district has the tampon situation covered.
“And a lot of time it’s not the teachers you’d naturally suspect of being groomers with a side gig in surgery. You know, the music and English teachers. Many times, it’s the assistants on the sports teams. They’re used to the sight of blood, for one thing, and a lot of them own sharp instruments already because they’ve got to be ready for hunting season. That’s why a man who calls himself “Coach” should never be a heartbeat away from the Presidency.
“We Republicans are not opposed to plastic surgery. I want to make that clear, because we want to hold on to the plastic surgery vote, which is mostly older white women who want to look like Jessica Rabbit. Our Leader has had his scalp tightened so many times that’s actually his armpit hair that he styles into that magnificent do. Matt Gaetz just recently had his face smoothed into that of a prom king’s, the better to attract dates for debutant balls. And without surgery, Marjorie Taylor Greene would still be just a small piglet grubbing at the trough at the hog farm in Georgia where she was born.
“But we draw the line at sex reassignment surgery for America’s youth during fourth period. That’s a hill we’re willing to be shot at and missed on. Can you think of a better reason to vote Republican?”
Or maybe homeroom periods—the Bellowing Felon was not clear what portion of the school day school officials were devoting to sex reassignment surgery, which typically takes at least two weeks and sometimes months to recover from. Not according to the Mango Miscreant, who said, “Your kid goes to school and comes home a few days later with an operation.”
The collective gasping from the media, the Twittersphere and bloggers everywhere was that of all the things Trump claimed have happened that never really happened, this was the most likely to have never really happened, ever. As Liz Cheney shrewdly observed, "Everybody's marbles fall out of a different hole in the sack," but a Trump campaign spokesperson went off the record to aver the truth of what the Cantaloupe Convict said.
“Absolutely it happens. You send little sophomore Johnny to school and he comes back Joan. A lot of Democrat states, parents almost expect it. While they’ve spent their son’s childhood buying him baseball gloves and guns, they’ve got a backup closet full of capri pants and Taylor Swift CD’s just in case the school bus drops him off in a dress. They know their district has the tampon situation covered.
“And a lot of time it’s not the teachers you’d naturally suspect of being groomers with a side gig in surgery. You know, the music and English teachers. Many times, it’s the assistants on the sports teams. They’re used to the sight of blood, for one thing, and a lot of them own sharp instruments already because they’ve got to be ready for hunting season. That’s why a man who calls himself “Coach” should never be a heartbeat away from the Presidency.
“We Republicans are not opposed to plastic surgery. I want to make that clear, because we want to hold on to the plastic surgery vote, which is mostly older white women who want to look like Jessica Rabbit. Our Leader has had his scalp tightened so many times that’s actually his armpit hair that he styles into that magnificent do. Matt Gaetz just recently had his face smoothed into that of a prom king’s, the better to attract dates for debutant balls. And without surgery, Marjorie Taylor Greene would still be just a small piglet grubbing at the trough at the hog farm in Georgia where she was born.
“But we draw the line at sex reassignment surgery for America’s youth during fourth period. That’s a hill we’re willing to be shot at and missed on. Can you think of a better reason to vote Republican?”
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